Imihigo irindwi
Reka tuvuge ubwenge bwamarangamutima -
imwe mu mihigo irindwi yera
“Nashakaga kwizera, kandi nizeraga ko ibintu bizagenda neza. Ariko nyuma naje kuvumbura, ndakeka yuko, ugomba kugira iyi myizerere yo kwizera ko ibyo ugenda ugana bimaze gukorwa. Byarabaye. Nimbaraga zo kwizera ko ushobora kubona, ko ubona amashusho, imyumvire yabaturage, imyumvire yumuryango, imyumvire yinzu imwe. Kandi ubaho ko usanzwe uhari, ko usanzwe muri uwo muryango, igice cyubwo buryo bwumuryango umwe, inzu imwe. Niba ubyiyumvisha niba ushobora no kwizera ko ihari, kuri wewe irahari. ”
Ayo ni amagambo yavuzwe na nyakwigendera kongere ndetse numuntu udasanzwe John Lewis. Ibi yabivugiye mu kiganiro na Krista Tippett, umushyitsi mukuru wa NPR yahinduye podcast yitwa "Ku Kubaho." Wumve neza ko ufata aya magambo, cyangwa ukayireka, hanyuma ugasiba iyi imeri. Kugira ngo umenye byinshi kubyo iki gitekerezo cyo kubaho nkaho hari ikintu kimaze kuba gifitanye isano na Ahera ndetse no kwiyemeza kwa Emotional Intelligence, soma.
Imihigo irindwi: Wibande ku bwenge bw'amarangamutima
Imihigo irindwi yubuturo bwera ihujwe nicyitegererezo cyose. Kwiyemeza kutagira urugomo bihujwe no gucunga amarangamutima kuva murwego rwa SELF . Ubwenge bw'amarangamutima nubushobozi bwo gusobanukirwa byukuri, no kwishora hamwe namarangamutima yacu kimwe namarangamutima yabandi. (Niba ushaka kuvuga kuri Dan Goleman, Ikigo cya Fetzer, na Parker Palmer, nyandikira; nshobora kujya ON na ON kuri ibi byose). Muri Moderi ntagatifu, ubwenge bw'amarangamutima "ni ukumenya no gutegereza ingaruka amarangamutima agira ku myitwarire no gukoresha ayo makuru mu kuyobora imyitozo."
Iki gice cyera kirashobora gufasha abo muri twe twinjiye imbere, kubwimpamvu iyo ari yo yose (nshobora gukomeza kubivuga, nanjye), igitekerezo cyuko amarangamutima ari ibintu bidafite akamaro kugirango twirengagize dushyigikire impamvu. Ukuri kwa neurobiologique ni uko amarangamutima ari ingingo zingenzi zidasanzwe zitangwa mumitekerereze yacu numubiri wacu kandi ko abantu bo muri iki gihe muri rusange bafite ubwoba bwo kubisobanura.
Impamvu imwe yabyo nuko icyongereza kidafite ubutunzi bwinshi bwo gusobanura amarangamutima. Abantu benshi bazamenya trifecta yishimye-ibabaje-basaze kandi batekereza ko ibi byose bikubiyemo. Nta nkeka. Izindi ndimi nk'Ikidage n'Ikiyapani nibyiza cyane kubyo abashakashatsi b'amarangamutima bita granularity amarangamutima - bakoresheje amagambo kugirango bamenye neza neza uko bishoboka kose ibyo twumva. Reka dusuzume ijambo ry'ikiyapani kuchisabishii , risobanurwa ngo “umunwa wigunze” kandi ni ijambo ryo guswera utagira ubwenge bigira uruhare mu bibazo byinshi by'ubuzima. Ushaka urutonde rushimishije kandi runini rwabasobanuzi kubintu ushobora kuba utarigeze utekereza mubijyanye n'amarangamutima, sura amarangamutima ya Jonathan Cook.com.
A sense memory can trigger a whole body response in a way that is unintelligible to the thinking mind, and just talking about it might not work because the part of our brains that puts words to things might be absolutely in the dark about what is going on. For example, let’s say I walk into the building one day and I see someone with whom I need to have a potentially challenging conversation. I feel very uncomfortable, so I dip into the bathroom. Suddenly, I’m freaking out a little bit, and before you know it I get a headache. Then I see a friendly face and am asked, “How’s it goin?” I may say, “Fine,” and just plow through the day, irritated and on high alert. Or I may unload on the friendly face and say: “That person gives me a headache! They’re so difficult!” Either way, how do you think my challenging conversation is likely to go later?
What I did in that example is succumb to the reenactment triangle. My body, due to exhaustion or whatever, interpreted feeling uncomfortable about a potentially challenging conversation as being unsafe. Suddenly, I’m feeling victimized by something that hasn’t even happened yet! And persecuting someone else for it! If the friendly face jumps in to save me, I’ve drawn them in to be my rescuer. This is how the reenactment triangle feeds itself. Now imagine that the friendly face I’ve unwittingly drawn into my reenactment is someone who reports to me. Rescuing makes them feel valuable and needed to their supervisor, so their tendency to jump in grows, further feeding the reenactment triangle. And remember, the potentially challenging conversation had not yet happened.
It is so easy to see how much of the health care industry is one big reenactment triangle. Imagine Epcot’s Spaceship Earth, a huge geodesic sphere, constructed of the reenactment triangles of patients, families, staff, community members, media, and so on. This is not unique to The Wright Center, not by any means; but, still, it’s ours to fix.
None twokora iki?
Icya mbere, ndagira ngo mbabwire ko niba dutekereza ahera nkuburyo bwo gukosora imyitwarire tudakunda mubandi bantu, tubura ingingo rwose. Iyo nzira yo gutekereza ubwayo ni mpandeshatu yo kwisubiraho, igashyira umuntu mubikorwa byuwahohotewe, umuntu twizera ko Ingoro ntagatifu izakemura uruhare rwabatoteza, nubuturo bwera mubutabazi. Iki kintu cyose gitangirana nubwenge bwamarangamutima nkuko bikoreshwa kuri twe ubwacu. Ni iki dukururwa? Bitubaho bite iyo ibyo bibaye? Nigute dushobora gutanga umusanzu, nubwo tutabizi, muri mpandeshatu yo kongera gukora? Nigute dushobora gutangira kwitandukanya ubwacu? Baho nkaho , kandi tuzabona abaturage bazamuka.
Reka dusubire kurugero hejuru, ariko tubirebe binyuze mumurongo wubwenge bwubwenge bukoreshwa. Umunsi umwe ninjiye mu nyubako, mbona umuntu nkeneye kugirana ikiganiro gishobora kugorana, kandi numva bitanyoroheye cyane, nuko niroha mu bwiherero. Ati: “Nibyo, Meaghan, turirinze. Turi mu ndege. Kumenya neza. Ntibyoroshye ntabwo bingana umutekano muke . Umwuka mwinshi. ” Nshobora gukomeza gucika intege gato, ariko nirinze kubabara umutwe. Ndambura gato kuko nzi ko rimwe na rimwe bimfasha kumva nisanzuye. Noneho mbona isura ya gicuti muri koridoro ndabaza nti: "Bigenda bite?" Ndashobora kuvuga nti: “Nibyo, umeze ute?” Noneho uhinge umunsi wose, uhangayikishijwe cyane nibiganiro bishobora kugorana nyuma, ariko umenye ko bimbabaza, kuburyo byibuze nshobora kubitambutsa nkabihumeka nkarambura bikenewe. Ndashobora kwemerera ibyiyumvo byanjye mumaso ya gicuti nkavuga nti: "Ndi muto cyane kuko mfite inama ishobora kugorana nyuma." Uwo muntu arashobora kubaza niba nkeneye ubufasha cyangwa ikindi kintu, kandi icyo gihe ndashobora gusuzuma niba nkeneye ubufasha cyangwa nkeneye ubufasha nicyo nkeneye ubufasha; ariko uko byagenda kose, natinze reaction yanjye kandi sinshushanya undi muntu muri reaction. Utekereza ko ikiganiro cyanjye kitoroshye gishobora kugenda gute?
Nkuko hariho inyabutatu ya reenactment, hariho inyabutatu yo guha imbaraga. Inyabutatu yimbaraga iduha amahitamo usibye abahohotewe-abatoteza-abatabazi. Turashobora gutoza, kurema, no guhangana natwe ubwacu nabandi. Muri verisiyo ya kabiri y'ibyabaye, narwanye kandi nkina umutoza nemera ko ndi mu ndege kandi nkishishikariza guhumeka. Niba mbajije isura ya gicuti kumpanuro zuburyo bwo guhangana ningorabahizi, turimo gushakisha ibisubizo hamwe, kandi nakwegereye uwo muntu mubikorwa byo kurema. Tekereza agaciro k'ibi kuri uwo muntu no kuri njye, cyane cyane iyo bambwiye.
Guhagarika ingeso bisaba gutsimbarara kandi bizaba bibi mbere yuko biba byiza. Ikintu cya mbere twese tugomba gukora nukurinda imbaraga zacu mukumenya imbarutso zacu bwite, ibyo dukeneye bituzuye, hamwe ningeso zacu zo gusezerana. Ni izihe mpandeshatu ziza kuri twe kandi ryari? Ni kangahe? Niki dukeneye gufasha gutuza muburyo bwiza kugirango dushobore kongera kwishora?
Twiteguye kubaho nkaho Ingoro isanzwe ibaho? Niba aribyo, tumaze gutsinda.
Inama yihuse
Nta na kimwe muri ibyo cyoroshye. Guhagarika ingeso yo kwisubiraho bisaba imbaraga nyinshi nkana no kwibanda. Hariho ubwoko bumwe bwamayeri yihuse ashobora guhagarika imitekerereze. Amagambo dukoresha yongeramo ibara ryamarangamutima kubintu tuvuga. Mubisanzwe tuvuga ngo "ni ikihe kibi kuri njye?" cyangwa “ni iki kikubabaje?” Ibi bifata amakosa. Turashobora guhinga amatsiko menshi, bityo rero umwanya muto ukarishye, aho kubaza "ibimbaho?" na / cyangwa “byakugendekeye bite?” Ihinduka ryamagambo rifite imbaraga zidasanzwe haba kuri twe ubwacu no kubandi.
Meaghan P. Ruddy, impamyabumenyi y'ikirenga.
Visi Perezida mukuru
Ibikorwa byamasomo, Isuzuma ryibigo, niterambere,
n'Umuyobozi mukuru ushinzwe ubushakashatsi n'iterambere
Ikigo cya Wright Centre for Graduate Education Education
